Happy Thoughts Anyone?

When I was young I drink too. When I walk down street, everyone look smaller than me. So I hit them.
-My grandfather on the evils of drinking as I pound down Asahi Draft Beer

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I'm proud to announce that fully 1% of my webpage viewers are Canadian. That's right my blog has gone international! What do you think aboot that, eh?

So you're thinking to yourself, "Why am I reading this drivel?" I say it's because you're waiting for me to say something bad about you to my reading public. Well you just better keep reading this blog because you never know when you might pique my ire! J/K! I'm not like that. I only think happy thoughts. I'm all booked up with people wanting me to think happy thoughts about them but if its an emergency you can find some happy thoughts on ebay.

Things to Remember:
1. Women can sense low self-esteem. Go properly armed into clubs.
2. I limbo like a master when properly lubricated (with alcohol!)
3. Oslo is a land of many museums...
4. Never have magazines send to your frat house... they dissappear!
5. Zebracakes (like young love) never age
6. Everyone talks about young love but you never hear about old love... better get some while you can (young love that is!)

Cryptoquip of the Day
a wtakl a eicr his qth mxk'w a dr qawt his
hint: a is i

Back in Blog

Half of winning is 90% mental.
-Yogi Berra

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Hey I'm back and I'm still not any closer to spiritual enlightenment. However I have discovered that I'm not cut out for the responsibility of not going to school. So here I am! Actually "here" is Ray's basement discussing my "Google-bility". That's right I've discovered that when my name is entered into Google, four of the seven websites on the first page are references to me! How exciting. Included in this list a link that goes directly to my personal information page from the Purdue website. So I'm pretty surprised that more of my stalkers haven't found this and make more creepy phone calls to my cell phone. In fact its strange how my stalkers haven't made their prescence known in any fashion whatsoever. Hmmm...

Anyway... I don't have time to be clever right now. So here's a list of things I wanna say about this summer.

List
1. Hess's wedding, what can I say... interesting
2. No, I'm not married
3. No, I don't have a child.
4. No, I am not leaving the country.
5. Shout out for Julia and Christy and the Wednesday night crew (Mike)
6. Clubskills... if you ain't got 'em, get them quick!
7. Kroger sucks!
8. Stay calm around crickets... or face possible facial disfiguration.
9. Ray, remember to put your head in a bag if videotaping yourself in intimate situations
10. Karaoke.... I'm haunted by Mike's rendition of "Pop" as I try to sleep

Disturbing Image of the Summer
Imagine.... A man with a gaping face wound. Harsh white lighting. The loud hissing... and BAM! There it is! A tube sucking the blood and bone out of his face! I'm horrified.